On Sex and Relationships

Love, desire, transgression—these are rich topics, indeed.

What Is Sacred Sexuality?

I’m a writer. It friggin’ offends me when words are used in a slapdash way, all wrapping and no substance. ‘Spirituality’ is one of the terms that gets my goat. It means such different things to different people, and it often doesn’t really mean anything at all—it’s as hollow as a vain man’s ego. ‘Sacred sexuality’ is […]

The Twosome Delusion

I’ll start with a radical statement: we are delusional, each and every one of us. Culturally delusional, too. How so? Because we have this notion of a single, unitary self when that’s not actually what we are. This has profound and subtle effects on how we are, and who we are, in our intimate relationships. […]

Have You Fallen Out of Love?

Love: the word means different things to different people—and different things to the same person at different times. What’s in a word? Here are some meanings of “love:” Erotic love. We all know what this one means. It’s what we mean when we say we’re “in love.” It’s “I want to have your babies”–or sometimes just […]

What Makes Sexy?

Woman walks into a cafe. She’s wearing a retro outfit with a stylish 40’s-era hat that bathes her face in shadow. She’s got great lines. She’s noir, pure film noir. I’m deep in thought and barely notice her. She acknowledges me, unsmiling, and passes by. Only then do I realize: I know this person and hadn’t recognized her because […]